No restraint

Suicide List

--Make arrangements for the kids; put them up for adoption, sell their organs, give them to ex-wife

--Quit work; get fired; d I s a p p e a r  

--Go through personal effects; dispose of through donating; take tax refund and mail it to a stranger  

--Reminisce(reflect) over the few photos, the unread letters, the forgotten memories (collected cobwebs over the dusty shoebox)

--Burn what is left of your belongings 

--Get drunk for days, into ceaseless nights; commiserate with the ones who have no place (the bums, the prostitutes, drug addicts, derelict dropouts); sleep on the streets, in cemeteries (theghosts can see right through your clothes)

--Follow the footsteps of ex-lovers; spy, stalk, smell the backs of chairs their hair lay across; do not let them see you, even if you are invisible 

--Wander through the booksellers' stalls; smell the yellowed paper, feel pages disintegrate beneath your fingers, gaze at the words you will never know

--Give your house away (to who?); abandon it, leave it for the rats, the roaches

--Tell the few you still talk to you are moving away you don't talk to anyone 

--Listen to your favorite song

--Surround yourself with people; sit on a bench and watch the crowds churn, break against and move away, disperse

--Spend the night where the wind blows, the whisper of the leaves, thoughts all alone

--Jump off a bridge, into the river; dive off a cliff into the sea; swim into the setting sun somewhere that isn't your home